Occupy Detroit. The Tigers are in Texas Anyway.

The Occupy movement is coming to Detroit. It/they/whatever plan to meet at the Spirit of Detroit statue and march to Grand Circus Park, which they will 'occupy' for as long as their members can maintain their interest, we suppose.

We have to admit that there is a certain cuteness to such protesters. Even though they tend to be little more than yawn inducing, they are true believers. You almost want to pat them on the head and offer them faux encouragement. You say: Who's a good boy? Who's a good girl? and wait and hope they grow up someday and actually try to make a real difference in the world. Because there are real problems in today's world which really do need to be addressed, and we need people with a certain fervor to address them.

These aren't those people. These are the kinds of folk who believe that all the troubles in the world are caused by The Man. You know, The Man, that fictitious leader behind the scenes of all things which harm The People.

All right, enough of that sarcastic blather. The whole Occupy movement, which will surely peter out when the protesters grow tired and head back home to the soft bed in mom and dad's basement (okay, no more sarcasm starting now), means to do exactly what? Are they stopping Wall Street's 'greed' by hanging around street corners? Are they bringing attention to an actual problem harming the average American? Are they perhaps calling attention to the hygiene issues which several days living in a tent will cause?

Okay, we are really, truly done with sarcasm now.

Isn't it interesting how they occupy areas which they presume to represent the worst in America? If they really wanted to impress us, they might try occupying the vast open areas on the east side of Detroit, where no amount of government cajoling seems to entice people to invest of their time, money, and effort. Because if you actually do want to know what's wrong with the US economic system, if you really want to see what environment a lack of production and individual incentive can cause, then you want to see the east side, not aging hippies who can't protest war because the current President (one of their heroes) is, as it turns out, as war mongering as The Man.

Otherwise, be charitable and take toothpaste and deodorants, maybe a crust of bread, to the occupiers at Grand Circus Park over the weekend. Take your kids too, as a lesson in life. Show them what might happen if they study sociology rather than business in college.

Okay, we promise. That's it for the sarcasm. We really, really mean it now. Because we have to go to work.