Canadian Form

Americans have a tendency to look at all things government and wonder, "How can I circumvent that?" For me a good example lies in a mere traffic signal.

One afternoon I sat in the left turn lane of an avenue which held me still because of a steady red arrow. That arrow meant that I couldn't turn. I found myself asking impertinent questions. Can I turn now? Will I get away with it? How much would the ticket be if not? Would there be points on my driver's license? There was absolutely no other traffic. I could have done it, I could have turned. In the end I waited for a green arrow. Curse your timidly in the face of tyranny, Marty.

Contrast this to the Canadian ideal of simply being nice. As it happened, I was soon after the above related incident driving along a route in Canada with a Canadian friend as a passenger. Caught by a solid red arrow at an intersection where I needed to go left, I asked my buddy if I might ignore the signal. "Oh, bad form," he advised me.

Yanks care about getting away with something. Canadians? Well, you decide.

Legal courtesies

I saw an old friend of mine yesterday; I'll call him Cloyce just to give him a name. Cloyce had called earlier in the week and said he had an extra ticket to Sunday's Tiger game and would I like to go. Sure, thanks. "I'll pick you up at Noon," he offered.

He picks me up, and a few minutes later we're caught by the traffic light at Woodward here in Detroit, where we had to make a right turn to go towards Comerica Park where the Tigers play. Cloyce is of course in the curb (turn) lane. The driver next to us toots her horn and rolls down her window. Cloyce rolls down his. "I'm supposed to turn here. Can I turn in front of you?" the woman asked.

Cloyce thought for a second before answering in a legalistic tone, "I don't think so", and went on and turned himself. I tell you, he answered as though she was asking his opinion on whether a turn from the second lane (where she was) was legal.

After he turned I immediately said, "Uh, Cloyce, she was asking if she could turn in front of you." He responded, "Really? "I'm not familiar with how you do things in the city."

As it happened the next light caught us and so did the woman. On my side, and she was glaring. "We're going to get shot!" fretted Cloyce. "No we're not," I assured him.

I rolled down my window and apologized profusely. "We're sorry, we're very, very sorry. It was a misunderstanding, honest."

She sneered, "Uh-huh" as though she didn't believe that at all (though it was the truth). But then Cloyce let her in front of him and we were past the crisis.

It was funny as all get out though. I still hear his naive, matter of fact 'I don't think so' as I write.

Cosmic traffic justice

I'm not a speed demon by any stretch of the imagination. But I do find myself driving faster than I once did. At one time I kept strictly to the posted limits. Now I crease the envelope a bit. When you drive a lot for your job I suppose it's natural to be in more of a hurry. I'm not justifying it, only explaining it.

Just the same, I have come to resent when folks pass me when I'm already speeding. Really? I'm going too fast myself towards a destination where arrival time isn't actually an issue but you're going somewhere so much more important that you still need to get past me? Maybe it's a passive type of road rage but still, it irritates. That's why what happened yesterday made me all happy inside.

I was motoring along a street almost 10 miles per hour over the speed limit. Yet for this nimrod coming up behind me that wasn't fast enough. He had to pass me. On the right, in the parking lane. He's not only passing me but doing something doubly illegal. I mildly mentally cursed his impertinence but was ready to let it go.

And I did let that feeling go. But I smiled openly when the next four traffic lights caught him, and I caught up to him each time. So you had to pass me, did ya? But now you ain't getting where you're going any more quickly, are ya?

I felt that a certain justice had been done. Cosmic traffic justice, if you will. And I am far too pleased with my attitude towards it.