I Will, Will I?

I get voice messages. The bulk of them are clipped and straight to the point, which is what I want. Tell me your issue in the voicemail; it helps me know what to tell you when I call back. If I am aware of your question I can determine the answer before talking to you. Or develop a really creative lie.

Last week a fellow left a voicemail which I laughed at upon hearing it. I don't think he meant anything, but it was funny.

After giving a brief description of what he was looking for, he proceeded to finish with, "You will call me back at 555.5555." 

Oh, I will, will I? 

Of course I did. He didn't say it like an order either, it was simply in the flow of the message, merely his off the cuff choice of words. Still, it's funny.

How Hard Can It Be?

The voicemail I leave on my phone is very specific: leave a message or I won't call you back. I get far too much spam to return unsolicited calls from numbers I don't know. Granted, that concern is alleviated somewhat via caller ID. Still, spam calls get through, and waste my time as well as anger me.

How hard is it to leave a message anyway? Has it occurred to you that perhaps in leaving a message it might allow me to better answer your questions before I get back to you? It generally does, you know. If I have an idea of what you need I can call back with options readily available. Or do you believe that Marty will be so curious as to who is trying to reach him that he'll return your call because he simply must know who you are and what you want?

You are far too confident in my opinion of you if you feel that way. Leave. A. Message. I will get back to you. Otherwise, No. I. Won't.