Trump Went Too Far This Time

We. as individuals and within our various groups, need to self police. We need to examine what we say and do and to explain, expand upon, and apologize as necessary for our words and deeds. And we cannot be afraid to censure our friends when they cross a line. Perhaps especially so then. President Trump merits censure by tweeting he was glad Robert Mueller had died. 

We should never, ever, under any circumstances revel in a person's death. What they need at that time are prayers, charity, consideration for their souls, and concern for the suffering of their families left behind. Stating we're glad they're dead is never justifiable. 

I don't care that our opponents have acted similarly. The defense that it's just Trump being Trump is a dodge. It does not matter that our adversaries will, and they will, use our necessary self reflection against us. We are called to love everyone. That means wanting the good for them. That means prayers and charity upon death. Even before that, quite frankly, but particularly then. Full stop.

The President saying that he's happy a fellow human being has died is disgusting, reprehensible, and indefensible. We must say it. Out loud. And no matter what. 

Hank

You know, it don't serve no purpose to forgive anyone's sins simply because you like him. But there may just be a lesson in understanding his background and seeing things in context.

One of my Christmas gifts was a biography of Hank Williams, Sr. He's the patriarch of a branch of country music royalty, followed his son Hank Jr., grandson Hank Williams III (a ringer for his grandfather in voice and appearance) and Coleman Williams, a great grandson whose stage name is IV, noting his place in the hierarchy. 

Hank's songs are often poetry and also often angst ridden (though not always), and I love them. Yet at the risk of severe understatement, his life was difficult. I won't bore you here with the details, but he went through a lot of tough stuff. Some was of his own making, perhaps. But when you become familiar with his background, maybe he can be cut slack. Indeed, I would argue he ought to be.

One lesson which is so simple that it shouldn't have taken me more than 60 years to learn is that being considerate of people is the essence of charity. Their indiscretions in and of themselves may well be indefensible. But what led to the errors of their ways, well, it's a factor.

Hate the sin, love the sinner. Hank weren't perfect. But he understood the world despite that. His songs show it. I think we're better off for them, and that gift mitigates a good many things.

Taking a Walk

The older I get, the more I believe we ought to be more charitable towards others. I doubt that we can fully understand the trials and tribulations of people, yet that doesn't mean we shouldn't be as considerate of what forces may or may not have affected their dispositions as reason might allow. It's a trope, yet there is a certain truth about walking a mile in your neighbor's shoes.

Still, I also think a line has to be drawn. Trying to be kind to my neighbor doesn't mean I have to agree with him. I can't see that the reason for walking that mile must be to accept his point of view (the feeling which I fear is typically meant when the line is invoked) but only to be more considerate of the challenges he faces. This can of course mean your changing your own mind. But not of necessity. Your neighbor might be wrong in his opinions and actions just the same.

I think what bugs me is that there's another side to that idea, one which rarely gets expressed. That is, your neighbor also has the responsibility to fit your shoes to his feet too, if the advice is to have any useful value at all. It is not a one way street. 

So, by all means, be considerate. But don't change your opinion unless that's really the right thing to do.

What we can do

Unless we are particularly blessed we struggle with things. It's simply part of the human condition. I think though that half (if not more) of dealing with the pressures and issues of everyday life lies in not allowing them to root at you; not allowing them to consume your being.

Lord knows I struggle with that. But to take the point further despite my own failures on the matter we really do need to learn, as that old saw instructs us, to know the difference between what we can and cannot control. Control what you can. Don't fret too much about the rest.

I can't control the recent events, peaceful protests or riots or whatever they actually are, in Portland. I can have nearly zero affect on them. As such, I need to pray that all will be well and let the problem go. It is not, and I do not mean this as flippantly as I may be accused, my problem, in any direct and immediate sense. We can apply this salve to quite a lot of troubles in the world too.

I am not in any way, shape, or form saying that we should not do anything at all with regard to Portland, or COVID, or world peace, world hunger, or world insert your own pet cause here. But let's face it: what all can we do? After voting and talking among your friends and being charitable with your money and time, what else is there that a little man or woman can do? Because in the grand scheme of things, most of us are, on Earth, little men and women.

Where does that leave us? I believes it leaves us at the task of making ourselves better by looking at the ways we can directly help others. I don't expect that when we meet St. Peter at the pearly gates he's going to sit back, fold his hands across his chest, let out a heavy sigh and ask "So why didn't you end the crisis in Portland?" I suspect, unless you were at the time of Portland unrest the President of the United States or Mayor of that city, we will be asked questions like, "Why didn't you offer to jump start your neighbor's car that bitter winter morning?"

"Why didn't you buy that street urchin something to eat?"

"Why didn't you give your change to Ronald McDonald House?"

If we do those things or a great many similar others we may well become big men and women to those folks. We certainly will become better men and women ourselves.

What Love Means

We are often told that we are expected to love others unconditionally. It is a good and charitable approach to our relationships with God and man. But what does it really mean? How are we expected to use such a doctrine in our daily lives?

For starters, it surely means that we are to love everyone without reservation. We are called to love everyone as though they were ourselves, to paraphrase a great moral teacher. It is a difficult ideal; loving our enemies is not easy, and sometimes loving our friends and family is a challenge as well. Still, we are expected to overcome this obstacle, and find a way to open our hearts to all.

But there is a great misunderstanding to unconditional love, an error in its application which is at least arguably worse than failing to love everyone around us. Many people believe that unconditional love means loving others up to and including their faults. We are, according to this, meant to love others including their faults, and indeed often embracing them.

This cannot be a good and true interpretation of the standard. It cannot be a useful approach towards dealing with others. We can accept that we must love racists and sexists and criminals; but to love their faults? This is insanity on its face. Do we not want to see people become better people? Do we not want to see our children grow into mature adults? Then we should be instructing and cajoling and beseeching those around us, as they should towards us, to do better than they do, and to be better than they are.

When our children become drug addicts or alcoholics, we do what we can to change them. When our neighbors rob and injure others, we enforce laws to stop them. We can and should still love them, but that does not mean we are obliged to tolerate them.

It is more correct to say that unconditional love calls us to love those around us despite their faults. Because real love does not embrace error. It understands it as a part of us which ought to be altered, and wants to see us move away from the lesser aspects of our being and into better men, women, and children. If it does not want that, it is not love. It is something which facilitates bad behavior; it is a cancer of character.