Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On

I ran into an old customer at a plumbing supply yesterday. "I could tell it was you, Marty, by your distinctive laugh," he explained. I hear that often, enough to make a guy feel rather self conscious. But I guess better to be known than not.

Why was I in that plumbing store? I needed a vent for my kitchen sink drain. "Let me see if I have that exact one, Marty," the counter man was telling me when I showed him the old one. "If not, there is another that'll work, but you'll need to reconfigure the line a bit." On hearing that, I fervently, fearfully hoped he had the original type.

He did. For $5.60 I had the part required for the easy fix. I paid, and that's when Old Customer called to me from the other end of the counter.

We chit chatted a few minutes before I excused myself. "Gotta go put this aerator on my kitchen stack," I said.

Old Customer yanked both the old and new parts from my hand. "Do you know how to tell one of these is bad?" he asked. 

Well, I already knew the one was bad. That's why I was there for him to hear my laugh. Yet he was bound and determined to show me just the same. "Hear that rattle?" he asked as he shook the old aerator. "That's how you know it's bad." Old Customer then shook the new part quite emphatically to demonstrate the lack of rattle.

But all I could think, in the moment of panic as he was delightfully showing me what I already knew, was, "Could you please not violently shake the one thing, the only one conveniently available, which will make my job easy?" 

Fortunately, no damage was done. I simply didn't need the demonstration, as much as it pleased him to offer the service.

Always Our First Choice

You know, if you're trying to pull the wool over someone's eyes, you really need to watch what you say.

A common refrain which we've heard for years is that "You're always the first guys I come to see." Whatever. I know it isn't necessarily true (though I trust that we are the first choice for many) and I'm okay with that. I understand business and common sense. If a fella's working two blocks from a plumbing supply and eight miles from me I don't hold it against him to buy from the closer store. I would too.

But as my friend Jen Psaki says, let's walk this back to my first point. It is incredible how many times someone has came into the old barn and asked for a part we didn't happen to have. "That's okay, Cosgriff, you're my man. You're the first guy I come to."

I can still hear me Pops, being the decent man he was, not wanting to hold a customer off from doing a job and offering, "You could call Cloyce's Plumbing Supply if you're stuck."

"Nah, we already tried them, Cosgriff." This response not more than a half a minute after assuring the old man he was always their first option.

In the first place, you don't need to zoom us at all. We'll be cool. In the second, if you're going to zoom us, at least consider that you're doing exactly that and not immediately contradict your wool pulling.